“It is for freedom that Christ set us free; therefore keep standing firm and do not be subject again to the yoke of slavery.”
Galatians 5:1 NASB
Independence Day! What is independence? What is freedom? “The land of the free and the home of the brave.” Is this even true? Is freedom actually something that someone else can give me or is it a perspective? While, I never take lightly the courage and sacrifice of our service men and women—I thank you and your families who have fought for and died for the freedoms and liberties we have in the United States of America, I don’t take them for granted and am very thankful for you—I wonder, though, if these freedoms our country supposedly provides really deliver the freedom so many of us desire.
Webster’s Dictionary defines independence and freedom several different ways, so for the sake of clarity in this discussion we will use the following definitions as they closely correlate and I believe capture the essence of our human desire: “not being subject to control by others”, “the absences of constraint in choice or action”, “liberation from the restraint from the power of another.”
I think we all want this type of freedom; don’t we? We want freedom–it just may look different for each of us. Maybe its freedom to be who you want to be. Freedom to say what you want to say. Freedom to love who you want to love. Maybe its seeking justice or peace not only to free yourself from oppression, but for the sake of a larger group.
While these are justifiable aspirations…
Have you ever considered that your desire for freedom is actually keeping you restrained from experiencing true freedom?
I was in deep. My longing to be seen and heard, my desire to keep my two kids under two alive and healthy, my desire to lead and have the appearance that I had it all together so no one could see the internal agony– I was struggling to hold it all together.
I felt justified because my desire for control in my parenting was driven by good intentions. My good intentions: having a clean house that was hospitable to visitors, protecting their brain development by advocating for playtime rather than screen time, being an example of love and gentleness while talking to my kids like they were people rather than “children to be seen and not heard”, and consistency in discipline. No matter my intentions, it didn’t excuse my yelling at my daughter when she didn’t pick up her toys after I asked her…again, it didn’t excuse the judgment I felt toward those who chose to watch movies with my son during the short few hours they watched him, it didn’t excuse the loud park conversations to parade the great job I did talking to my children, and it didn’t excuse me interrupting my husband’s parenting to prove I knew better.
Prior to parenting, I fought to win the debate, be right in the argument, recognized for my achievements, or acknowledged for the hours I volunteered; underneath the surface of these behaviors was the longing to be understood—the longing to be enough.
Many of us are tempted to justify toxic behavior when our intent appears “good.”
We believe self-care will fuel us, teamwork at the office brings us together, and excellence in our career means we’re working hard. We perceive a strong social media following means we’re competent, passing an exam says we’ve succeeded, children who obey means we’re doing something right, and peace in our home is, well, peace in our home.
But if downtime means putting off important responsibilities, then self-care is actually self-indulgent, teamwork is a guise for elevating yourself as a leader or slacking off to not do as much work, and screaming for everyone to just “be quiet” is the way to achieve peace—well, it’s time to look at a heart change. If all the success and achievements we seek merely feed a hunger for recognition, adequacy, and image, our good intentions don’t matter.
Our problem isn’t always the thing we desire, rather the relationship we have with that “good” thing.
I just want five minutes to myself. I just want to be rescued from this anxiety. I just want the kids to stop yelling at each other. I just want him to love me back. I just want my family to understand me.
While you’re discontent with life not being how you want, do you sometimes feel trapped by internal angst because something isn’t done the way you wanted? Does your blood boil when people vote differently than you? Do you feel constricted when you’re told to behave a certain way? We saw a lot of these behaviors in ourselves and others this last year with the different approaches to “the pandemic”. Although not everyone adopted the idea that COVID-19 was a “pandemic”, our country, our cities, and our internal lives certainly became pandemonium. The different approaches to mask wearing, social distancing, and vaccinations created an uproar in our souls as we fought for the “greater good”. The challenge is that for some, the greater good was abiding by the changes to our laws and CDC recommendations, for others the greater good was fighting for our right to make our own choices for ourselves and our families.
Maybe the real issue is that our desires are like chains around our feet that hold us back from moving forward.
When our pining for that thing we desire becomes our focus for freedom our actions become dysfunctional. Maybe we end up hating people who get in our way, manipulating others, or resenting people who have favor over us. Maybe we have senseless arguments or throw a tantrum like a toddler because we didn’t get what we wanted. Maybe we turn to an addictive behavior or habit. Our chains.
At the core of this ache, what is it that you really want? What would freedom look like in your life? Though you did not choose this circumstances that led to this dissatisfaction, you desire freedom from its hold on you.
There is good news: there is a way out!
More good news: the way out is not just another to-do item to add into your already crammed day. The way out does, however, require one small move.
“Beloved ones, God has called us to live a life of freedom in the Holy Spirit. But don’t view this wonderful freedom as an opportunity to set up a base of operations in the natural realm. Freedom means that we become so completely free of self-indulgence that we become servants of one another, expressing love in all we do.”
Galatians 5:13 TPT
Surrender.
Open up those hands gripping control and accept that Jesus is the one in control.
When we choose to release the control over our own lives and the lives of others and grab a hold of Jesus instead, His Spirit frees us. Rather that grasping for the desire for freedom that leaves us empty, God gives us freedom to love. Jesus shows us how to love. He helps us see that living for our own desires actually hurts ourselves and others.
Jesus empowers us to love, to serve, and to live. In the Christian world we often hear the prayer “God break off the chains that _____” and we fill in whatever area we feel is holding us back or constricting us. What if we consider an idea that comes from what God’s promises have already told us in the Bible:
Jesus already broke the chains, you just have to step out of them.
Whether you’ve chosen a life with Jesus or not, you’re probably familiar with and even share his solution: LOVE.
The world’s understanding of love is caring for yourself, feeling a particular admiration or freedom of judgement toward others, or creating a safe environment. While these are all “good” desires, below is how God defines LOVE.
“But the fruit produced by the Holy Spirit within you is divine love in all its varied expressions:
- JOY that overflows
- PEACE that subdues
- PATIENCE that endures
- KINDNESS in action
- A life full of VIRTUE
- FAITH that prevails
- GENTLENESS of heart
- STRENGTH of spirit.
Never set the law above these qualities, for they are meant to be limitless.”
Galatians 5:22-23 TPT
Love calls us to action. Love calls us to serve others. Love calls us to surrender the desires we long for and seek what God desires for our lives and those around us. As we break off the chains that weigh us down, we learn to love how God defines love. We learn to replace the chains of:
- selfish motives with love—for God, ourselves, and others
- discontentment with joy—gratitude and security with what we’ve been trusted with is enough
- anxiety with peace—God is in control and we can be secure even when everything around us is shaky
- irritation with patience—breathe, it’s okay, we are all in process
- malice with kindness—we all have a story worth sharing that motivates our decision and actions; seek to understand
- cruelty with gentleness—speak life: build others up with your words rather than tear them down
- rage with self-control—like lifting weights, start small- discipline requires practice
Maybe true freedom isn’t independence from something else, but rather full dependence on someONE who is dependable.
Freedom Christ gives calls us to love and love from Christ frees us to live.
What chains are you ready to step out of today? Post in the comments; I’d love to pray for your strength as walk in this freedom. Has God already freed you? Please share below and encouraged other readers.
Prayer: God thank you for caring about me enough to want whats best for me and my relationships. Please show me the chains that lock me up. Show me the things in my life I desire more than my desire for you. You are love. You are joy. You are peace. You are freedom. Help me to step out of the chains and walk in your freedom. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
NOTE: This is not a space to air our political opinions. Please, I encourage you, DO have those conversations with your friends and families. This, however, is a safe space for our hearts and minds to stretch beyond what is happening around us. We will evaluate hard questions and search our souls. We may discuss challenging topics of the heart, but all for the sake of seeking God’s guidance, will, and growth for our lives. Thank you for respecting this environment and helping us all move forward peacefully and productively together.
danielle_kazarian 